Love TimeLine
Centuries of Love
November/December 1996
By Libby Stephens, Utne Reader
PREHISTORY
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Scholars believe that in the earliest forms of "marriage" people lived and worked in groups, not pairs.
"Therefore shall a man leave his father and mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh."--Genesis 2:24
ANCIENT TIMES
The wedding ring as we know it may have stemmed from the ancient German practice of offering a ring to a bride on the tip of a sword--a pledge of union. More than 2000 years later, in 1938, the DeBeers diamond company launches a campaign to make the diamond engagement ring as essential as the wedding band.
5TH CENTURY BC
"By all means marry; if you get a good wife, you'll become happy, if you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher."--Socrates
385 BC
Plato writes: "If there were...an army...made up of lovers and their loves....Who would desert his beloved or fail him in the hour of danger? The veriest coward would become an inspired hero, equal to the bravest at such a time; Love would inspire him." Greek men have long been celebrating homosexuality, ideally man-boy love. Marriage, however, is a business deal; men marry women to run their household, rarely for love.
323 BC
The Egyptian wife has plenty of power over her husband: He must pay a fine to his first wife, for example, if he wishes to marry a second one.
...
1ST CENTURY AD
With the emergence of Christianity, Roman marriage changes from a procreative duty into a choice. Marriage requires female consent, and the role of "wife" takes on as much dignity as that of "friend." But "love" isn't necessary for marriage. Greek essayist Plutarch calls love a "frenzy" and believes that "those who are in love must be forgiven as though ill." Meanwhile, virginity is glorified, sexual connection deemed foul, and homosexuality is punishable by death.
c. 270, Feb. 14
St. Valentine is martyred. The association of this chaste, holy man with the ancient pagan fertility festival of the Lupercalia, an ancestor of Valentine's Day, is believed to be pure accident.
2ND-3RD CENTS.
In an era abounding in luxuries and pleasures, Christians stress morality and encourage husband and wife to unite chastely under God. Intercourse is to be passionless and, as Clement of Alexandria stresses, should occur only after supper. Daylight hours should be devoted to studies or prayer. "He who too ardently loves his own wife is an adulterer."
3RD-4TH CENTS.
Brahmin priest Vatsyayana, believed to be a lifelong celibate and ascetic, writes one of India's most erotic works, the Kama Sutra. Meanwhile, Jovian, a maverick monk, is excommunicated in 385 on the grounds of heresy and blasphemy for calling marriage superior to celibacy. Eleven years later, however, St. Augustine, who dares to deem pleasure a normal part of procreation, is chosen Bishop of Hippo.
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