Activism Section: Soul of a Citizen Living with conviction in a cynical time The Doctor is Out Why a ragtag medical team trades hometown comforts for Third World hell Confessions of a Nonpolitical Man The Hermit as Activist The Pie's the Thing Sometimes the camera is bigger than the cause

I'm forced to face a difficult fact: I will do nothing overt--nothing political--to further causes I believe in. An awful admission. Certainly there is no dearth of causes, all asking for our most committed support. What is wrong with me that I cannot bestir myself to do anything more than sign an occasional petition, write out a small check?

Somewhere not all that deep within, I know--or suspect--that the blockage represents a failing. And I would like to--I think--change myself, to think my way through to an understanding of things out of which action would result naturally.

But how? I am not apathetic. I admire those who feel the compulsion to act out their beliefs and find meaningful ways to do so--but I do not join. The obvious defense is that these activities are useless, that they will not stay the course of the world or stop the powers that be from enacting their schemes. But such an argument is beside the point. Protest and activism have hastened the withdrawal of troops from Vietnam; brought about important legislative victories for blacks; pressured the South African government to end apartheid policies; forced the shutdown of flawed nuclear facilities. The charge of uselessness will not stick.

What stops me is, in part, the sheer complexity of offenses. A total situation--a mesh of social and economic components, a labyrinth congruent with society's deeper structure--begs a total response. And a total response is impossible. Logic, of course, protests--one cannot do everything; one should not therefore do nothing. I could put my voice and body on the line on behalf of some small part of the web. Others would be doing the same for other parts. Perhaps some collective results could be achieved.