Crash Course
(Page 3 of 4)
July / August 2006
Nina Utne Utne magazine
NU: I think we're all trained to stop listening
to it.
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MS: That's right. We all have a mind-body
problem. But age introduces that same silence into the mind-body
that my paralysis did. One of the things that yoga does is refine
the quality of the presence we experience within our bodies.
NU: So what does this presence have to do with
trauma?
MS: When trauma is not transformed over time,
you become less present. You end up being kind of a shell of
yourself. You don't take in the world with pleasure, you don't let
it flow through you and you don't let it out. When you lose that
presence, you lose connection to the world. That's when trauma
turns into depression, and the more you become separated from the
world, the deader you become.
Trauma registers in both mind and body. For example, I was
asleep in the car when the accident happened. I have no memory of
that day. But 12 years after the accident, when I started to do
yoga, I started to have flashbacks, like posttraumatic syndrome
flashbacks. My body was having memories. The echoes of the original
accident were finally coming through. Part of the reason it took so
long is that my mind was not ready to deal with what my body had
witnessed. When I was 13, I learned to disassociate from my body to
avoid pain. As I regained presence through yoga, these stored
memories began to dissolve.
NU: These are all personal processes, but is
there a role for the wider community in healing trauma?
MS: That's important. My experience is that
trauma does not happen to one person, or even one family. It
happens to a whole community of families. I missed the funeral for
my father and sister because of my injuries, but there's something
incredibly collectively healing about a funeral, to be around all
the love for a lost one. It's part of the cleansing and healing.
When we are in community-with other bodies and hearts-that spurs
another level of cathartic release.
There are many types of collective trauma, too. We can never go
back to before 9/11. The world will be different from now on. And
of course the world's always had violence in it, there's always
been anger. But our collective trust in the world and the security
of the nation got shattered. So the question is, what do you do?
How do you respond? Hitting back after an insult is one way to do
it, but ultimately we're not going to transform this trauma by
trying to violently counteract it. That's not going to work. I'm
not saying 9/11 is a good thing, just as I'm not saying that my
being paralyzed is a good thing, but what trauma does by
challenging your assumptions is force you to see the world as more
open. The challenge is to try to see it in a way that makes you
love the world more. Essentially, to be open and compassionate.