So you think you're a grown-up?

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In this age of introspection and getting to know the child within, it seems increasingly critical that we get to know who we are and what we're about. Toward that end, I've developed a pretty airtight little exercise to help you answer one of the most crucial questions to have plagued humankind since The Munsters

went off the air in prime time: Am I a grown-up?

You don't have to study for this test, there are no essay questions, and we're going to sweeten things a bit by starting you out with 100 points.

1. You're in Radio Shack and have exactly enough money to buy batteries for either

(A) your smoke detector or (B) your remote control, but not enough money for both. Which do you

buy?

If you answered A, you're Even Steven. That's what you're supposed to do if you're a grown-up. If you

answered B, knock off 9 points and go back to watching Full House.

2. Do you have galoshes/rubbers/boots to wear in the snow?

Yes? Your mother would be proud. Take a bow and tack on 8 big ones. If not, don't sweat it. That's why

God invented leather high-tops. If you own rubbers but snicker a little when you say the word, you get

6, not 8, points and a stern look from our publisher.

3. In the last 12 months have you:

A. Worn the 'B' side of your underwear to avoid doing a wash?

B. Smoked a joint?

C. Purchased a Janet Jackson CD?

Well, all three are going to cost you. A is only a deuce. B is a four-spot, and C, well, this is where it

gets kind of ugly. If you answered C, you should take off 15 points and then go call a cab--this quiz is

over for you.

4. If you were throwing a party, would you:

A. Have formal invitations printed?

B. Fill in the blanks on those cellophane-packaged invites?

C. Fashion a sign out of a Domino's Pizza box and nail it to a telephone pole?

A and B are a dead heat at plus 3 points each. No bonus for the fancy schmancy preprinted ones, but C

is going to cost you an even dozen.

5. There are three boxes of cereal on your breakfast table and you have to have a bowl of one

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