War Rationale: Version 10.0


| April 1, 2004

The Bush administration has erased and re-written its justification for invading Iraq time and time again. Its take on the United Nations' role, on reconstruction, political transition, and the cost to the American taxpayer have all changed with the seasons, and the bumpy ride isn't over yet. Whew! Luckily, help has arrived to sort out the mess. P.J. Crowley, a senior fellow, and Robert O. Boorstin, senior vice president for national security at the Center for American Progress have compiled a review of the shifts that, as they put it, 'resembles a software program that, at first, works brilliantly, but then catches the user in a cycle of 'fatal error' messages.'

Version 1.0 warns us that 'Saddam Hussein poses an 'imminent threat' to the American people' and his 'smoking gun will be a mushroom cloud.' Yikes! Version 2.0 foresees that 'Saddam Hussein is ready to use weapons of mass destruction,' but luckily 'we all know where the weapons are.' So, let's go get him! Version 3.0: Wait!, Saddam didn't try to buy uranium ore in Niger! Version 4.0: 'Saddam has deep ties to Al Qaeda,' and he'll give them his weapons to use against us. Version 5.0: 'The United Nations just can't handle Iraq.' Version 6.0: 'The war in Iraq won't hurt our efforts in Afghanistan or the hunt for bin Laden.'

In Version 7.0, mission accomplished! 'The troops will be home in six months.' Version 8.1: 'The war will pay for itself very quickly' with oil revenues. And just to make you feel good, in Version 9.0, 'Democracy comes to Iraq,' and 'we [are] greeted as liberators.' And if you think that there might be bugs in this software, go directly to Version 10.0: 'Trust us. We know what we're doing.'
-- Jacob Wheeler

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