'Tis the Season to Be Way Too Jolly

| 12/23/2014 2:56:00 PM

Couple in bed

Tim White, PhD, LPC, NCC offers advice on family planning and parenting, LGBT issues, disability issues, education and work issues, relationships, ethics and "unusual" social issues. Send questions to Tim for future columns through his website.

Hi Tim,
I am a girl, 24 who has always been a good girl and I even waited to have sex until I was married to my sexy husband one year ago. Since then, the sex has been nearly constant after I graduated college last year and went to work. We have some kind of sex literally every day, even if it is just a quickie at lunch and several times a day on our days off. We have also gotten adventurous and do it in cars in parking lots, elevators, dressing rooms, outside, and countless other places. The more risky, the more exciting it is for us both! We have also explored various kinks. We made a deal that no fantasy is off limits, and when I was a repressed teenager one of my favorite fantasies was to do it in my parents’ bed. We will be at their house for the Christmas and they will probably leave to run errands and see friends, so I was to sneak in a session in their bed. There may be other relatives there, but we can be quiet. My husband thinks it is disrespectful, but I think he is being a prude! I think he should relax and enjoy it, the way he has in so many other forbidden places.

Also, thanks for the great column and Merry Christmas! — Yule Libido

Hi Libido,
A Merry Christmas to you and yours as well, but it sounds like things cannot get much merrier for you, unless a plan is in the works for you and the hubby to quit your jobs and devote yourselves to full-time sex. I know most of us who have read your letter are either red from embarrassment or green from pure envy, so you have achieved the perfectly holiday reader palette.  Even though you have decked the halls, countertops, back seats and countless other surfaces with your carnal presence, you have a naughty fantasy involving your parents’ bed that does not have a fa-la-la-la-lot of appeal to your husband.

Remember, hubby is a generally open-minded man who has no issues with getting it on in parking lots, retail establishments, and probably waiting rooms, restaurants and inside that city block-sized temple of seasonal fruitcake ingredients in any supermarket right now with minimal encouragement, but even he has a naughty limit. He is uncomfortable with living out your fantasy in question, one that is not uncommon but may arguably feel like impropriety to a son-in-law. You are no longer a teenager, so it may not be as fulfilling as keeping a secret, unfulfilled desire. Given your level connubial bliss, not much else is likely to ever go unfulfilled. You can afford to let this one go for your partner’s comfort, and maybe both of you can indulge yourselves with a full night’s sleep.

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