Ups and Downs


| 9/30/2014 10:59:00 AM


Tags: advice column, family advice, parenting advice, relationship advice,

Elevator buttons

Tim White, PhD, LPC, NCC offers advice on family planning and parenting, LGBT issues, disability issues, education and work issues, relationships, ethics and "unusual" social issues. Send questions to Tim for future columns through his website.

Hi Tim,
I am a single mum, 30’s, raising a 14 year old boy who’s well behaved and makes good grades. For the past 2 years, he’s also been an elevator enthusiast, meaning people who ride all types of lifts round-trip, document or videotape the experience and then share later online with like-minded people. He has a good friend, a girl who shares this passion and somehow they managed to find each other in this big world. Now they explore the city in their free time, always collecting lifts. I try to be cheery about his hobby, watch his videos and thumb through his massive scrapbook with him, but his fascination does not seem to be waning and I’m wondering if this is normal? — Let Me Off Here

Hi Let Me Off Here,
You must surely be grateful that your little darling did not become an Urban Explorer or a Chernobyl Stalker. Elevator enthusiasts have become a full-fledged subculture through online videos, and there are thousands out there to watch. The movement even inspired a documentary titled Elevated: An Uplifting Community (2011). Apparently, these folks have a keen appreciation for every detail of the machines: buttons, lights, doors, décor and views. We would likely not question a stamp collector or model vehicle enthusiast, and certainly not the avid birdwatcher. They do no harm by celebrating the craftsmanship and iconic functionality of these vertical transporters; you really have to admire this quirky community for pursuing what they truly enjoy.

Torn Over Telling

Hi Tim,
I think my best friend’s Dad is cheating on his wife. I am an intern at the office where my friend’s father works. He is very close to his female coworker, and she calls him her "work husband." They go to lunch together a lot. I have heard about and witnessed this, and recently I found out they have gone to a spa on their lunch hours and gotten massages together! As far as any of us can tell, they go to their respective homes separately, but they could easily be meeting somewhere so of course we are expecting to catch them leaving together. Should I mention something to my friend so that she can talk to him? — Torn Over Telling

Hi Torn Over Telling,
There is nothing to tell your friend. You all have seen nothing other than a couple of coworkers getting on like peas and carrots, joking and — gasp — eating and heard about them getting individual rubdowns. Typically, spa patrons do not massage each other! Whoever else is included in “us,” meaning the office gawkers who gather to track every movement of these seemingly innocent coworkers, you must call a Meeting of the Snoops immediately, and henceforth disengage from one another. Get back to work!