The New England Patriot Factor / Meet John Kerry On Friendster

As we brace ourselves for the campaign mudslinging to come, much
speculation has arisen concerning John Kerry’s mass appeal. The
Bush campaign is gearing up to label the Senator a ‘Massachusetts
liberal,’ (with Massachusetts as a byword for effete,
latte-sipping, out-of-touch-with-the-rest-of-America politics). But
as Sam Parry points out in The Consortium News, in this
mode of attack, the Bushies are ‘confronting a new and unexpected
obstacle’ in the form of a certain red, white and blue clad team of
Superbowl Champs.

Yes, Massachusetts is also the home of the Pats, the ‘tough,
resilient, blue-collar, ‘waiver wire’ team’ that conquered the NFL.
Parry thinks that the memory of 1.5 million Patriots fans
celebrating the victory of a revered American pastime will be
difficult for Bush to override.

Meanwhile, in an effort to reach the young’uns Howard Dean left
behind, John Kerry has joined the popular networking website ‘Friendster, whose 5.5 million registrants are 27
years old, on average, is a logical place to find the young
voters,’ reports Brian Hindo for Business Week. A quick
perusal of Kerry’s profile (only accessible to friendster members)
finds the leading Democratic aspirant attempting to recast himself
in a hipster’s image. Join the site to find out about Kerry’s jones
for windsurfing, motorcycles, and protecting the environment, and
his affection for musicians like Springsteen and movies like
Animal House (or you can just take our word for it).
Gushing testimonials from Kerry’s friendsters include effusive
pledges of support and solidarity like this one, from a Kerry fan
named ‘Benjamin’: ‘John’s the type of dude where you’re like, that
guy can be our president.’
Eliza Thomas

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The New
England Patriot Factor

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Meet John Kerry – On Friendster

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